Over a year ago I heard a podcast interview with the founder of the 5 minute journal. He convinced me to record three things a day I was grateful for. I downloaded the app because I am not a paper person. Every morning I went straight for the app to contemplated what I was grateful for. He said you can’t be depressed when you are grateful, which made a lot of sense to me. Eventually you spend a lot of time staring out the window trying to come up with something new.
After about 9 months of recording on the app, I decided to change it up and got the paper journal. I thought reaching for my phone first thing wasn’t doing me any favors. So then I reached over for my journal, tried to find the pen in my drawer, then stared at the paper journal and out the window. I did that for another 3 months, and one day just stopped.
It’s been about 4 weeks. I’m back to my old habit of waking up and reaching for the phone. But no gratitude. Do I feel any different?
The weird thing is, I am not feeling guilty. I actually feel grateful that I don’t have to do that as part of my daily routine. Coming up with three things a day for a year, maybe they’re ingrained in my sub-conscience?
I’m not even depressed that I went back to starting my day checking email and Facebook. I satisfy my craving of knowing what happened while I was sleeping. It’s an immediate drug I need upon waking. I felt anxious the other way around.
For now my curious nature is getting the better of my gratefulness.
Anyone else with me?